(Orlando looks overcome at the audiences applause)

Orlando: Ahhhhhhhhh! (How do you compare to THAT screaming cuteness, Mr. Frodo Baggins)

(Cybil starts stroking his arm)

Cybil: Don't be scared, I won't hurt you

(Orli looks down and does this cute scared face)

Graham: Look at you, coz you're it now aren't you?
Orlando: Am I?!
Graham: Yeah! I mean obviously it's Orlando we knew who you are, we've heard you are the new Leonardo Di Caprio
Orlando: Leonardo Di Caprio?! Wow...
Graham: Yeh I know! Well we put an internet search on your name and there were 29,000 results!

(Orlando giggles)

Orlando: No! really?!
Graham: Theres on average fifty fans joining fan clubs every single day! Is that weird?
Orlando: Yeah it is weird, especially because I'm a complete technophobe, I mean I have no email address, no computer so I haven't really seen any of that stuff
Graham: Just as well, I have.

(audience laughs)

Orlando: Oh great [grins oh so kutely]
Graham: So are women now, like, throwing themselves at you?
Orlando: Well...no not really...I mean I have long blonde hair in the movie so people don't really recognise me as of yet
Cybil: I didn't

(Graham gets out a large picta of Fellowship)

Graham: He is that one (Points to Legolas)!!! Leggy uh... Leggylulu or something like that.

(Orlando laughs)

Graham: Is that how Leggylulu was supposed to look like?
Orlando: Yeah. Leggylulu is supposed to look like that
Graham: What IS his name?!
Orlando: Oh it doesn't matter, Leggylulu works great. Blonde haired arrow twanger works good too

(audience and graham laughs)

Graham: Anyway anyway, you started off as a rather normal actor, Guildhall-
Orlando: National Youth Theatre
Graham: Casualty
Orlando: Yeah, yeah
Graham: London's Burning...
Orlando: No
Graham: You haven't been on London's burning?
Orlando: Nope!
Graham: Aaaaaaaaaaaaah, you haven't lived!
Orlando: (kute puppy dog face) Yeah I know!

(Orlando laughs)

Graham: But you did do Midsomer Murders...
Orlando: Yep I did, got that gig straight out of drama school. Well, I got Lord Of the Rings and the very next day I got a call saying Do you want to do Midsomer Murders and I was like, okaaaay!
Graham: Did you die?
Orlando: YEAH! Oh it was awful! But kool. I got it in the stomach with a pitchfork and it was like

(Orlando does an IRRESISTIBLE lil mimic of him getting a pitchfork through the stomach)

Orlando: I just did this awful death... thing
Cybil: What's that?
Graham: Midsomer Murders, a village which has a higher death rate than New York.

(Everyone laughs)

Cybil: I heard London has a higher death rate than New York. Thats what CNN said.
Graham: US Station, they would

(Orlando doesnt stop laughing)

Graham: Very exciting... you have got your own merchandise

(Gets out a Legolas doll, which might I add is oh so adorable. Isnt it strange, that in shops there always seems to be an empty shelf where the Legolas merchandise is sposed to be)

Cybil: Wow, you're a dolly!
Orlando: I know, (cute smile in Cybils direction) isn't it great?
Orlando: He's only trying to get it out so I can play with myself!

(Graham, Cybil and audience laugh)

Graham: Ya know that thought never crossed my mind!
Orlando: My kids can play with my doll, how great!
Cybil: You have a kid?!
Orlando: Oh nooo, just when I do

(Graham gets the doll out and the arrow shoots from his arm)

Graham: Oops.
Orlando: you're getting too over excited!
Graham: You can fire arrows?
Orlando: yeah, I've tried it actually, look

(Orlando takes the doll)

Orlando: OK You need the arrows, and then you put them here...and

(Graham giggles)

Graham: It's quite sweet you KNOW how to play with your doll

(Orlando giggles all shyly)

Orlando: yeah I know

(Orlando fires the arrow but it doesn't work properly)

Orlando: Oh it's something like this!

(Orlando throws the doll over his shoulder and Audience/Graham/Cybil laugh. Cybil grabs it)

Cybil: let me see it

(Cybil puts the doll down the front of her dress, Orlando cringes)

Orlando: Oh my god! I have to have a picture of that!

(Cybil makes the hand move up and down)

Orlando: Oh my-!

(Throws his head back laughing and claps, looks slightly embarrassed)

Graham: And very quickly what are you going to do next?
Orlando: Well, I'll be doing in film in Australia with Heath Ledger soon
Graham: A Knight's Tale Heath?
Orlando: Yep, the guy from a Knight's Tale. It's called "Ned Kelly" He plays Ned, I play his best friend, bit of a ladies' man, Irish accent kinda thing
Graham: Well if you need help with the accent...I'm a pro
Orlando: Okay!

(Orlando laughs)

Graham: Thank you very much, Orlando Bloom everyone!

(Everyone claps)

(Later on in the programme, Orlando, Cilla Black *another guest* and Cybil are with Graham, looking at weird stuff from the audience's childhood)

Graham: What is that?!

(He holds up the purse with the 40 year old bellybutton)

Orlando: Let me see that!

(Orlando gets up and looks at it)

Orlando: Woah...

(Graham gets a box with eighties' stuff in and theres a picture of two horses)

Orlando: Oh my god!

(Orlando jumps up and points)

Orlando: Mating! They're mating!
Graham: Yes Orlando, we've all seen that!

(Orlando laughs sooooooo kutely! He blushes and laughs, picks up the purse containing the bellybutton. End Of Show Thing Music, you see Orlando Shake hands with Graham, then goes up and starts talking to someone at the front of the audience!)